#TheConnector

What is your Passion and Purpose? (2)

Stella Holman - The ConnectorInt 1 Comment

Four days in to my new life as a Care Support worker (Nurse)  wasn’t going well.   Basically, I don’t have the strength to man-handle people on their beds to wash them etc.

On the first day I found it very emotional.  I realise that we all take advantage of the freedom we have in our lives.  Most of us have no health issues and can get up and go for a walk when ever we feel like it.  Many of the people this particular Homecare Services take care of do not have that option but are relying on someone to do just simple tasks for them…

I met a lovely Christian lady who knew someone that I know and she only had the use of her right hand and can just about move her head.  She was always very bright and cheerful and intelligent.  I could feel myself getting quite tearful as I could empathise how frustrating it must be for a bright minded person to be trapped inside a body that can’t function.

With only the use of one arm she was keen to get onto her lap-top and communicate with her friends via email and with the use of her one arm could use the phone to call out.

I don’t know anything about MS but have since found this page on Facebook –

http://www.facebook.com/nationalmssociety.

I love “Technology” – I would like to put a project together and raise funds to create applications to help people with MS and other disabilities.

This would be a good purpose that i could give my God given skills to accomplish something that would be of benefit to a great number of people, so it is important for me to realise that in my own strength I can do nothing, I need to rely on the Grace of God to be lead to the work that he needs me to accomplish…

 

What is your Passion and Purpose?

Stella Holman - The ConnectorInt Leave a comment

My passion and purpose is to be an Entrepreneur and to inspire others to use their gifts.  It all started with the fact that our family history on my Father’s side originates from the Native Sioux Indian, via Grandmother who was in the Entertainments Business with Buffalo Bill‘s Circus

Sioux Indian’s are very spiritual – I have to confess to not knowing that much about them sadly but I do know and understand that they were very Psychic –  and my Father had inherited the gift of Psychometry.  He was very good at this and helped a lot of people.  Lots of people came to our home to have a consultation.

I had a really good relationship with my father until my mother and I joined the local Church of England Church and I was confirmed in 1971.  I think following the Christian faith and spiritually it was rather conflicting.  Spiritualism is part of the Occult – Darkness v Light.  after my Confirmation my father and I didn’t get along so well.

I was musical, was involved with singing and I learnt to play the guitar at school, participated in the choir and our school regularly put on concerts and musicals, both at my junior and the secondary school that I attended though being a Christian at school was another conflicting situation, so I didn’t have many friends and when I left school I went straight into Banking.  I worked hard but didn’t get promotion and then was introduced to a job at the local theatre setting up the drinks in the interval.  For seven years I used to work over 60 hours a week, in the Bank during the day and at the Theatre in the evenings.

In my early twenties I was re-united with my school friend who had chosen to go into the Hairdressing profession and she led me into Network Marketing,  while I was out and about in the evening with Party Planning I met my future husband,

From time to time I had gone along and had the occasional Tarot card reading, which strangely enough from time to time was quite accurate and just before I was due to marry I went and had my birth chart drawn up.  Sadly, I lost the information but did remember that I was told not to get married to this person, that we would be in conflict all the time! Well, it was too late to back out and hurt a lot of people so we got married in 1993 and had two lovely children, who are now teenagers and a great credit to us both, but sadly our relationship didn’t survive and we divorced in 2002.

SERVANT

When i had my birth-chart drawn up I was also advised that I was going to be a “Servant” “Writer” and also a “Nurse”

Well life being a journey and all these possibilities didn’t seem like they would happen to me at the time.

The years that followed the marriage break-up have been challenging and I have been glad of my involvement with the Church as a solid foundation to build my life on the ROCK of Jesus Christ.  I committed my life to Jesus and became “Born Again” in 1997, my son was born in this year and also my Mother past away.

In my early twenties through to my late thirties I was on the committee for a local social club and had a very active social life also so community building is something I have learnt with recruiting people into the club

When my children were at their junior school  I used to be a leader via the church with their youth club, I undertook this position for seven years. This also led me to go into their school with other church leaders for the “Jesus and Me Club”called “JAM Club”

In 2002 – I went back to college as a mature student and undertook the City and Guilds Diploma in IT ( the link is for info – I studied at Sussex Downs College, Eastbourne) and also changed my church and joined the Christian Outreach Centre Movement and undertook the Spirit, Soul and Body Bible School for two years.                                                                                        Within the Church we undertook the D.I.S.C personality test  and this is where I then understood the concept the Servant and Servant Leadership.    

Click on the link above to read the section “Characteristics of being a Servant Leader”

Thankfully due to my working life I have gained the experience to be a good communicator  and I am competent to make decisions.            My Spiritual Gifts give me the discernment to pay attention to what remains unspoken and it is therefore important to listen to my inner voice\affimation from the Holy Spirit.  I can rely on that inner voice in order to understand what the body, mind and spirit are communicating.        I really love technology and I have been willing to follow and learn from the Social Media Experts and Geeks to learn all i can and now my ideal client is someone who is a true Entrepreneur. Combing with my passion for music really gives me the passion to help Musicians though i am willing to extend my services to everyone connected with the Entertainments Industry.    In the past three years I have got involved with the local “Rock Music Community of Bands and Supporters and have made connectiions and new friends via their Community in London and World-wide.

WRITER –

I created this Blog – Daily Ramblings of a Professional Networker  

to portray the “Life of Networking” online and offline. A diary of life experiences.   I have had severe writer’s block for the past two years when i started to combine it with “Encouragement and Life Coaching”  I had started to train to be a “Life Coach” but finding the people who wanted a coach and also the people i wanted to coach was a challenge.  This is something i have had to put on hold temporarily for the time being though I pro-actively work as a Personal IT Coach and share articles and write articles that i share as a Social Media Expert.

NURSE

I am about to embark on a course to train to be a Carer in the Community.  I will be looking after people that rely on someone to come in and help them to remain independant by staying in their own homes.   I will be doing this on a part time basis so i can also continue with my passion and purpose as an Entrepreneur to network with those that have the heart-felt motivation to inspire others to use their Entreprenerial Talents especially in the Entertainments Industry…

 

 

,

Friday I’m in Love

Stella Holman - The ConnectorInt Leave a comment

Friday I’m in Love – was a blog I wrote last year that explained about my love for networking and going out and meeting other Entrepreneurs.  The event I wrote about was at the Business Franchise Exhibition at the ExCeL London Exhibition and Convention Centre, where I was allocated to chair a mock-up for a Boardroom in alliance with the Ecademy Business Network

Last Friday I went to a local free networking event to meet up with someone I made contact with on Twitter who advised me that she has been following my Tweets for a few weeks and had read my recently blog and identified with my situation.

We identified the strengths and weaknesses that we both come across in our daily work and agreed to see if we could collaborate to form an alliance.

Now I will be putting together a proposal for her to view to make plans to move ahead.

Following on from banter on my Twitter ac @Stella_Holman this week…

Stella Holman - The ConnectorInt Leave a comment

…I made a new connection in my town who said she had been following me for several weeks and liked the content on what I posted.   Now I have been invited to attend a local networking event on Friday organised by EDEAL in one of our hotels.

Since I have been sharing pictures and events of the group Letz Zep  though out my various Social Media sites I have made lots of new contacts in the Music Industry.  Weirdly enough out of the blue I started to be tagged in the pictures of Letz Zep on Facebook that had been taken by Musikota.Com

The Tribute Band Guns and Roses from Bilbao also seem to be tagged back to me, I think probably my business friends and contacts from church will think I have flipped!!

All this tagging on Facebook has made a vast improvement to my Klout scores which took a noise dive to 59 when I added one of my Facebook pages and took off my personal account.. All this recent activity bought it back to 75 and it has since increased to 76 this week – http://klout.com/#/Stella_Holman.

All about “Giver’s Gain”  I couldn’t achieve this without collaboration from other people.

ROI – Return on Investment then is the people that then get in touch with you about either your services or perhaps in my case how what I do could help them with their own Social Media Marketing.

 

Good night!

 

 

 

 

Actually, now I am out of sync with the time……

Stella Holman - The ConnectorInt Leave a comment

….I am going to bed later and getting up later along with the other members of the household.  

In November of late I went along to a Women’s Networking evening and met Jo Bremmer who introduced me to the Lyoness International Cashback and Loyalty Club.

With the intention of doing most of my shopping through this card I would be able to create myself a residual income plus commissions of quite a substantial amount.  Most people that I know well are dreadfully cynical and suspicious of doing anything new and when you see the figure of how slow it is to create something they tell me that it is not worth it.  But I just have this feeling that all things big start from things that are small.  After trying for six years to get people along to networking events of which they find tedious and boring as they are introverts and have no people or networking skills I look at actually what does rock their boat and find that it is “Music”

No word of a lie – in fact in the past six months I have connected up with people from a wide range of life of whom I had never met if it hadn’t been for the fact that I started to attend local live music “Gigs” and met some famous people along the way!  

As we know we can’t be good at everything with the exception of a few people the Musicians are not that good at IT and Social Media is really complicated to them so I agreed to help someone out and have made lots of new connections and I am find it all every educational.  Seems to be quite a small world between the fans of Led Zepplin for example, if you look on their Facebook friends everyone seems to know everyone…

 Then I undertook a session with Stuart Kerslake on Core Process and mine was getting a buzz out of helping creative people which had been my initial intention with my Coaching Course helping Entrepreneurial types get started in business networking.

Going back to Social Media you need to create a type of Momentum around a subject to get others talking and so you need to create a tribe of people supporting and the only way to start that off is to support them,

 

A type of givers gain, creates energy that draws people in.  

 

 

Are you Satisfied with an Average Life?

Stella Holman - The ConnectorInt Leave a comment

Do I need to lie to make my way in Life?

Exaggeration is also a form of lying and should be avoided at all counts…

Typically, Monday was like any other day though it was a inset day so my son Julian was off school and as he had sat up half the night on his Xbox live at 11am he was still asleep

 My daughter Sonia is still trying to get her toe healed after having an Ulcer and spends large amounts in time in bed. She can’t get a job at the moment as she is unable to wear shoes so she has no money and is fed-up.

 In some respects the negativity of it all is draining my energy levels; I used to enjoy working from home, now I am seeking ways to escape.

 I was due to start a new project working with a London based business who was receiving funding to get his “Mobile phone applications business up and running but it appears he has been scammed and now is having to take the Investment Company and their agent to court.  The agent so it appears has stolen the money and so this London company is not able to do anything at all, least of all pay me to commence all the social media work.  

 Maybe it is a selfish though to think and say that all the plans I had for this year now won’t happen.  My trip to Amsterdam to see my friend Jet Rotmans and go to see LetzZep with her at the Melkweg Theatre has to be cancelled.  Going along to a Organo Gold Presentation and meeting Gerry Van Zantvoort and Helen Roosing won’t happen either as we are now almost in to March.

 For the past six years I have worked with Ecademy as part of their support team and that has gone now as well.  When it changed over to Sunzu they already had a team in place and the old team including yours truly have been left behind.  For the past six years I have lived and breathed Ecademy and business networking and now I am feeling a bit lost.  

 I’ve had to put my coaching course on hold as well.  I can’t seek myself getting back into that again either.  Most things are standing in a check-mate state.

 I just feel in a paralysed state

Why do we allow our thoughts to give us limitations? (1)

Stella Holman - The ConnectorInt 2 Comments

The fear of loss is a motivating factor if it can propel you in to action, .however you may in the beginning be paralysed with negative thoughts that stop you changing your mindset and doing things differently…

Life is very challenging for me at present and also I can empathise with those near and dear to me that are also finding that they have challenges to overcome.

We had an interesting morning in our church on Sunday, Pastors Ashley and Ruth Schmierer were our guest speakers. Ps Ashley was talking about how he had been limited as a child by the negative comments his teachers had made about him. That he was the clown in the class and that they didn’t think he would amount to anything. He is now the COC International President.

Ps Ashley, was speaking about how we allow our thoughts to give us limitations on what we can achieve in our lives.

For those of us that have a FAITH /Christianity is about having a relationship with Jesus via prayer, praise and reading the Bible, those that have given their life to him and invited the Holy Spirit to live in them then can understand the scriptures and the power in them to transform lives. It is also important to have Christian fellowship, always there will be people in the body of Christ that you don’t see eye to eye with, but you can also find people that you do get along with and these people will inspire and encourage you in you daily walk and you can do the same for them. I have found FACEBOOK really powerful for this and daily connect and share content with my fellow Christian connections all over the world.

In our every day lives we have to get along with people that have no faith at all and we do our best to get along with them as we care about them as they are our friends.

In the case of the work place we find that we have to adhere to the thoughts and intentions of those of whom do not follow the same mindset. This is where the root of negative thinking starts to rise… Other people’s perspectives start to cloud our thinking.

In the case of the working environment you might have to follow the plan and purpose for someone else’s business…, you might well find yourself in the same situation that happened to me that someone used a rather calculated method to gain my attention and support.

Have you heard about the Chameleon in the Office scenario?

Do read the interesting blog written by my colleague- Blackstar Sharon Egan – I actually I winced when I first read it  –The third paragraph down was in fact the very thing that snared me– “So, when with you, they’ll mirror your beliefs, your values, your attitudes… and, because of that, create fantastic rapport with you. You’d think they were your best buddy..-Apparently, this is a ploy taught in sales and in particular network-marketing.   Of course in my case – I am a “Connector” sitting on a rather a large database of names which is appealing to people that are building lists of people to contact.

My personality in business is Servant Leadership- with the main concern of helping someone else to achieve their purpose and goals…I align myself to the people with the same mindset…

Coming back to the shared mindset and what would actually attract you to work with someone to see that their goal to earn a living happened and what would you feel like when the truth dawned on you that their why had changed so much that you had that gut feeling that now life was treating them so well (not through their own efforts might I add) the initial effort that they seemed to put in currently was none existent…   I can remember when I first got started first words given to me were we are here to build the network and forget about the product. 

Leadership requires patience and perseverance; I also think that to really take heed and respect the circumstances of others is important.  I think back now and wonder why did I align myself up with people that really didn’t care at all about the plans and purposes of others, why did I get swept away with the dream that this was going to be the way forward for me….

There are however, people in this business who are doing exceedingly well and are making the money that gives them the lifestyle that is promised, those with a true heart of a team spirit.   

In the very beginning I know I was on to a winner as the money came through as a result of prayer and it all worked well for the first six months or so, then people that joined the team all dropped away and those that are left are not in it to build the team, just there for the enjoyment of the product.  Fundamentally, core values of a Servant Leadership – not just about looking after yourself but about looking after other people.    Therefore encouraging people that have no surplus income over and above existing expenses to overspend is immoral.  Also, coming back to the beginning regarding negative comments building a team based on “Trusting relationships as the foundation for collaboration and service, affirming that all relationships should be based on trust and mutual respect, not power, status or coercion. Coercion – (like a form of bullying, threats or
intimidation.) 

Taking all of these circumstances into consideration I now realise why that breakthrough that I really needed to happen hasn’t…..

Are you at the Crossroads of Life?

Stella Holman - The ConnectorInt 4 Comments

 Which path do you choose – that of personal gain or making the choice to help others?

 The more difficult higher road of helping others, you would be amazed at the impact you will make. Well, it doesn’t mean you have to give up what you want to do…, you can use what you have already accomplished for yourself to help others. Don’t simply aspire to make a living; aspire to make a difference… I have no interest in what you have—only in you.

In getting and gaining you become successful, but only in helping others do you become significant!!!!

 

In getting and gaining you become successful, but only in helping others do you become significant.

 

Weird how things develop, one action in a particular direction…..

Stella Holman - The ConnectorInt Leave a comment

 …can create a different set of events.  That’s how it all started, never my intention to spend a lot of time in this particular pub as rock music wasn’t high on my agenda, in the beginning I didn’t like it at all and I didn’t really like the people that went there either…

Not that I think I am better than them or anything like that, I just couldn’t relate to them…then one day I was convicted that I should make an effort to befriend a few.   Not that difficult, there was a small group that my friend knew and at the end of the evening they were most often the worst for wear, their consumption of alcohol would have taken it’s toll and I would help them get home in my car.  On those occasions I would only have one alcoholic drink myself.

We may disagree on this issue as a Christian, nowhere in the Bible does it say you can’t have a drink, just says don’t get drunk.  For your own protection really as it alters your mindset, you end up saying and doing things you other wise wouldn’t have done. 

 I can confess to being partial to a glass of red wine or two which is relaxing  so evidently the car these days gets left at home and I get a lift there and back and sometimes share a taxi home…

Over the past three years we have all met up a lot at the pub, we have all gone to Butlins a couple of times as well to the 70’s Weekends, we have had meals at my home…  These days I know most people there at the pub and I’m there every weekend.  I have a vast mixture of friends both young and old…

The small group of people that once I would not have had anytime for are now my friends and I have begun to understand why they are drinking so heavily, the ultimate weight of their lives issues.  Disappointments, heartbreaks generally everything that goes on in my life too and this is just their way of handling it. 

I have gently probed them about their understanding of God, most of them are not believers, or once they did have a faith but there have been major issues in their life which have eroded it away…

The music has sort of grown on me, the bands; I am now keen to attend when they play at our pub.    I see that in fact it is a great passion for many people to be singing and one Christmas I went to a Christmas event and heard a local band, befriended them on Facebook and for a while followed the person  the person led me to know other women who share the passion for the music…

We became almost “rent a crowd” , where the band plays locally we will be there.  I noticed the person took advantage of his role as the leader and was exploiting it with who ever was willing to be taken advantage of, needless to say a few broken hearts have developed and our group has  gone from “rent a crowd” to just us two! My friend and I who have decided not to entertain any of this

At the very last moment the other week I went to the Congress Theatre to see one of the UK Tribute bands for Led Zepplin – I have never thought about listening to this band, never bought a record in my life, but despite acoustics being really poor, probably as the venue was half empty I could see the singers had a passion for the music, I couldn’t hear the words but I enjoyed the instrumental side of it.    

I connected with them on Facebook, just the same as I do with anyone else….

Last Saturday at our pub we had a guest singer with a group that probably sing there once a month… I only discovered this when I went to look at the photo’s. This time I am not in any photos as I didn’t go near the front due to the of the heat of the evening being so humid outside the inside was about 35c…made the discovery that the singer was in fact with a very famous tribute band Letz Zepp, of course I have never heard of them and since have just carried out a little bit of research.   I am interested to know more about the spiritual side of it as having been told about the darkness that is involved with it while doing so I pray against the darkness  and believe for God’s protection