The Sober Friend….

On a sobering note ……..

If you consider drinking and driving these days. With the amount of daily accidents on our roads it really is not at all wise. If you are involved in an accident and even if it’s not your fault you could loose your licence and even go to prison if someone gets injured or killed.

I’d loose my job if I lost my licence and no doubt you would too!!

In the autumn, my family made me promise not to get behind the wheel of a car after drinking, my son says he doesn’t want me to miss all the celebrations of the forth coming birthdays and Christmases in future years.

I know people turn to alcohol in times of stress. Go home after work and have a strong drink. But, I’ve cut back on drinking because my daily expenses have risen with the price of diesel and commuting to the office 3 or 4 days a week. Also, the increase in energy bills.

Actually, I feel a lot healthier for drinking less.

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Beginning November

Autumn is a good time for reflection and recuperation and live life at a slower pace when you can after work in the evenings and weekends.

I’m grateful for the Hybrid working pattern, now it’s 3 days in the office and 2 working from home.

Love the drive in the countryside to work. This week it’s been dangerous with torrential rain, trees fallen down, flooded roads making traffic jams and sadly accidents. 😩

My town was gridlocked with traffic jams and flooded streets. Had to give going to the Health Club a miss in the week but thankfully got there today for Aqua Fit. While I was in the car I went shopping.

A friend went into hospital so no Wednesday Fellowship Group this week. Nice to have the night in 😜.

Dark evenings – the season of winter. I am grateful for the chance to slow the pace. Cost of living rises is a contribution to this. But since Covid doing less has been beneficial. Even when I met up with a friend who lives locally we spent a lot of time staying local, eating in and watching films at home. It has been lovely. ❤️

You can enjoy your life without spending lots of money.

Everyone is feeling the changes in our cost of living making everything so expensive.

My favourite band – http://www.the-big-blue.com/listings.html Been a follower since 2012. Going to see them play in various locations in East Sussex. I keep this as a commitment at least once a month.

I am quite good with money. I buy my food and snacks for work from the supermarket. Take sandwiches every day.

Other things I buy via subscription on Amazon – heavy goods like the cat food gets 15% off when ordered with 4 other items and is delivered too.

I understand the philosophy of paying by cash and locally – great for non chain businesses but some items these days are really hard to get hold of in the local store

For example bereavement/sympathy cards, can never buy them locally any more.

Got invited to opportunities to make addition income. Have a few meetings to listen in on this weekend.

I am just going to cook a small roast pork joint for myself to eat Will be ok for tomorrow too. Managed to buy some parsnips. I never think a roast is the same without parsnips. 😜

October

This month seems to have past by quite fast.

I only have one regular commitment in the week because my working weeks and days for locations are never the same. If I could do three days working from home and two in the office I could have regular commitments.

Healthwise, I try and squeeze in going to the health club either morning before work at 6am or in the early evening after working from home about 18.45pm. My daughter goes twice a week so I can go with her. A bit gruelling after work but easier going with someone else.

Spiritually –

keeping strife out of my life ‘requires willingness to constantly communicate and confront issues… prayerfully ask for the Holy Spirit’s help to be a person who avoids strife and restores peace everywhere. It’s not a simple task, people have their own inner convictions on what is right or wrong for them.

I have the calling on my life – Servant Leadership – selfless love in everything – : “(Philippians 2:4 Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others”

Galatians 5:14 – Love your neighbour as yourself – have an unselfish concern for others and do things for their benefit.

(John 13:34-35).

Love one another as I have loved you.

My daytime job as public servant in the local government requires me to uphold their services and not be judgemental which is in line with my faith. Not to discriminate against anyone even though I do not always agree with their way of life.

I walked another ten miles to raise money for Tear Fund – a charity my church – All Saints Church supports. – Tearfund Disaster Relief is a Christian charity working in more than 50 countries 🌎such as the Ukrainian humanitarian crisis, the East African food crises & the Pakistan flood crises. I raised £90 thanks to the generosity of my friends.

A great contrast in weather conditions here in Eastbourne . September was really lovely weather and I really caught the sun and it was sweltering hot.?This walk was a challenge with the blustery wind, rain and muddy conditions.

Someone gave me a bin bag to put over my head. 😀

Have to keep the fitness regime going as I’ve committed to walk again next September this time 50k this time up in London walking along the Thames.

Yesterday I walked into my town and back.

Now the clocks have gone back and it’s officially Autumn/ Winter it will be important to take a walk lunch time every day while the sun is shining or even if it isn’t otherwise the mornings will be dark and evenings too. Shorter days.

This Tuesday is All Saints’ Day (Or All Hallows’ Day in old English) which means that Monday evening is All Hallows’ Eve – known by nearly everyone these days as ‘Halloween’. Traditionally All Saints’ was a day to remember and celebrate those who have “Died in Christ”- those who have lived lives reflecting Jesus’ love and have now “gone to glory.”  Indeed, in countries such as Poland, All Saints’ Day is still celebrated by families gathering together to put candles on the graves of loved ones – and by Monday evening Polish cemeteries will be aglow with the light of millions of candles.

Our British Halloween traditions originate from village communities where local children would dress up to mock the “powers of darkness” on their last evening of influence before their defeat when All Saints’ Day dawned. 

These celebrations weren’t a sign of evil’s power – quite the opposite – they were a celebration of Christ’s victory over evil.

But modern Halloween celebrations seem to have turned in a much darker direction, with shops filled with increasingly dark and unsettling costumes. Gone is the light-hearted teasing of a defeated enemy. Instead there seems to be an embrace of wickedness, with none on the light of All Saints’ Day.

We live in a world where evil and pain really exist and whilst many will see this years Halloween celebrations as harmless fun, it may come at an unseen and unintended cost. Are we looking towards the light or are we wrapping ourselves in darkness?

See you in November….

September

September went fast.

Ultra Challenge Day went well. Met a few new people (women) that enjoyed walking. Discussed doing a similar challenge next year. I said it would need to be flatter, enjoyed the sunshine and got a lot of exercise. My feet survived it. No blisters thankfully.

Week 2 – not so good- thought I had a Gastritis flare up, chemist gave me “Milk of Magnesia” which really seemed to give me a burning sensation in my gut. For a long time, I was unable to eat anything. Just drinking sips of water and lying in bed due to having a fever. Went back to work on the Thursday and found two others had had the same issue.

Week 3 – my long awaited vacation but due to a type of gastric flu not able to venture out too much. Most plans for this week cancelled because of the death of Queen Elisabeth.

In a way I was grateful not to have to go up to London even though I had been looking forward to seeing my Entrepreneurial friends. Not seen them in person since before lockdown/covid. Actually, I’ve not been on a train since before Covid either.

I have just been driving in my car and using the bus. Started my Sussex Gospel Partnership Bible Study Course, one a month for 2 years.

Week 3- On my week off I went to the local health club, went to watch some friends playing in their bands at various venues in Hastings.

Week 4 – Then I was fortunate to be able to work from home for a few weeks.

Discovered I had lost 10kilos. Now I can wear my super dry jacket again.

Keen to keep up the fitness regime. Making sure I actively walk or go to the gym weekly to walk on the treadmill.

Regrets, I’ve had a few,

the opportunities that I thought were for me, only to discovered I didn’t have what it took to bring them to fruition.

Sins – thought, word and sometimes deeds.  I am not perfect but I am thankful that by the grace of God my sins are forgiven when I am repenting and renounce my sins

The relationships I tried to cultivate with non-believers that made me angry because of the lack of commitment, distrust and no inner peace.

I am grateful now i realise that all these situations taught me wisdom and instilled in me the discernment to know that in all situations God has to be first.

“But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. “

In relationships – 2 Corinthians 6:14-18 (Adapted from The Message)

“ Don’t become partners  ( close relationships/ in business) with those who reject Jesus as God. How can you make a partnership out of right and wrong? That’s not partnership; that’s war. Is light best friends with dark? Does Christ go strolling with the Devil? Do trust and mistrust hold hands? Who would think of setting up pagan idols in God’s holy Temple? But that is exactly what we are, each of us a temple in whom God lives. God himself put it this way:

“I’ll live in them, move into them;

I’ll be their God and they’ll be my people.

So leave the corruption and compromise;

leave it for good,” says God.

“Don’t link up with those who’s ideas go against God’s will for your life”

It is of great benefit when I spend time in the word each day, even in my busy life I know it is important to still  make time for God. My smart phone is my best resource to have the Bible app, subscribe to daily prayer and bible readings, listen to podcasts from inspiring speakers. and enjoy listening to inspiring worship leaders on Spotify.

I am a member of All Saints Church, Eastbourne  and attend a home group every week and get prayer support for my needs.

Try to give with a willing heart via tithing 10% of my earnings.

Each and every morning in prayer I bring my daily needs to God and believe that he answers and hears my prayers.  I have a prayer journal so I can look back and see my progress.

I believe that God has opened doors for me that cannot be closed and that he will continue to draw towards me the right people to help me succeed and give me wisdom and guidance. I thank God for the seeds that are being sow and that they are bearing fruit.  I believe that God gives me the Holy Spirit to empower me to carry out the work he has put on my heart to carry out and that he is daily guiding my steps.

I thank God to renew my heart and mind so I can aspire to clearly display the fruit of the Spirit in my daily life – the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.”

Great start to #Monday morning on my Twitter @Stella_Holman that made my day!

I always check on Facebook ,Twitter etc for notifications to follow up with and this morning i was delighted to see a posting published by Social Media Examiner and shared by my colleague Mr Mike Turner @TinDigital about making the most of your #LinkedIn profile.  Well I for one are always interested in making #LinkedIn work better for me as and i love to share posts on my #SocialMedia page IT Personal Coach. After I did this I found out that I had been added to the #list  SMExaminer/most-engaged-followers.  Following on from that I was then added to the list jrtaaffe/socialmedia-people.

My Twitter to be fair needs a bit of tweeking, but with

I’ve been added to quite a few lists and of course I have created some of my own which have worked out to be beneficial to share content to my followers.

Suddenly the Horizons were Limitless.

I carried on working through my emails and notifications , answered an email from a business connection on #LinkedIn who had sent me an invitation to join a Global Market Place.

When I first got involved with Internet Marketing I made the acquaintance of people involved with International Trade and participated in the buying and selling of commodities, so I was drawn to find out more information on TLDE.

TLDE is an Inclusive B2B Marketplace™ with own phone and trading system where you can connect, network, call for free + trade online P2P in real-time at 0% commission. Well  0% commission can’t be bad can it? Do check out the Membership Benefits

Then contact me to receive a discount code  – Tweet me at – Twitter @Stella_Holman

The #Risk requires #Faith

As a practicing Christian and an International Networker, I am constantly meeting people from all walks of life and I therefore need to ask God to help me have an empathy and affection for those that are different from me.  My daily prayer includes my request that God would enable me to have a desire to show the world the beauty of a unified yet diverse community.

All my business pursuits are currently operated by myself only, I use tactics and technology to share content to a wide network of people.  I use certain hashtags so that people who search for my products and service can receive the information.

Practically, everyday I have to send out some content of some description, ie the daily blog, photographs, written content and I share articles written by other people.  Participation on groups.

I am seeking people who seek a new way to position themselves in the market-place. And also seeking people who would be interested in using products and services in their everyday life that would give them a some return in finance to build a residual income.

I never know what each day will bring, I have to trust God for the right people to contact me so that I can make a living.  People filter through to me, I don’t necessarily know who in each day I will be speaking to, but I know that I will be speaking to someone. Exercising patience is a faith building exercise to receive through faith and patience what God has promised (Hebrews 6:12)

Having the heart and destiny for “Servant Leadership” can have its rewards as well as its disadvantages

Having the heart and destiny for “Servant Leadership” can have its rewards as well as its disadvantages.

Through my friendship with my neighbour who is involved in the local music scene I got to know a few musicians and a local film production company.

Via the film production company I began a friendship with a man who suffered with mental illness and to an extent housebound

I have no concept or experience with mental illness and It was very challenging for me, also to spend time with someone who is living their life on the opposite side of the day.

It seems that when people have no motivation to get up in the morning tend to sit up for half the night and then get up late, so your early evening is their morning then the trouble is your late evening is their midday so they are raring to go when you’re starting to slow down.

I helped my friend with his housework, shopping and we also spent some time creating some music which was published on Soundcloud.  Just a bit of a comedy spoof nothing serious.

In 2012, I undertook some training to be a Life Coach, it gave me great pleasure as I am passionate about being Entrepreneurial I was keen to help awaken the spirit inside him so he would explore his entrepreneurial talents and move him to a place where he could be active in the community.

I succeeded to encourage him to begin painting again which then led on to his love for theatre and it seemed his talent for being a script writer and a producer.

Well this is what he told me and also that he had achieved other things, so I had no reason to doubt it and so was carried along in the moment I guess.

It was all very feasible and convincing that I never doubted it! Well, I did a little bit of sleuthing on the web but never found a single grain of evidence to what he said which did make me wonder a bit..

Melio Media Films were going to offer my  actor cousin Mark Lindsay Chapman, a role in their new film while Mark was in  Eastbourne visiting the family, but once my friend was introduced to Mark  the whole situation totally changed.

We were planning on working together and using my Social Media skills and decided to create a film company, though at this time I wasn’t aware at the time that my friend’s involvement with past script writing and production was in fact very minimal even to the point of only brain storming new ideas and supporting someone else’s work, so I didn’t realize that he wasn’t actually capable of writing a script, so when I was talking to the Mark and his colleague  I was backing up his story that he was competent to undertake the work they were wanting to give him and so it fueled up his ego to think that he would be competent and from that point onward wouldn’t allow any form of communication from me which he understood to be negative, in other words if I dared to mention that I didn’t agree with him!!!

During this time the new film company had been created, I was suppose to be part of this team and use my social media service , but when I went to implement things I found that the Web Designer had already started and so it upset my strategy and I was cross and then more problems arose as I was told I was upsetting people and so it gave a negative reaction and another reason why he decided  I should leave  the team. Overall, I didn’t have much of a say in what happened including what I was going to do myself and so we reached a mutual understanding that I wouldn’t have any involvement with it at all!!!

Then Steve and I  had a long chat about past events and we discussed how our mutual friend had got involved with his company  and he told me that they had known each other now for about six years and he though he was helping him by giving him a little bit of work to do from home, unpaid work, but it gave him a small bit of responsibility, he had encouraged him by calling him a film producer, not realizing that our friend would take this literally and use it as a platform to try and gain trust and deceive people about his abilities.

All this came as a bit of a shock to me, especially as i had introduced him to my trusted sources!

The epilogue in this situation is that our mutual friend’s talents do not lie in script writing production but more at a level of “project manager” who has managed to gain influence to create a group of budding actors/actresses that are now creating short films.   I would say good luck to them!

This trail of events made me feel very low and I had another accident and fell down some stairs damaging my collar bone which made me feel that  I just wanted to take a back seat from everything however since I have been online for the past twenty years and have built this system with it’s various processes my life is entwined with all the other people I have linked to on the various business and social networking sites, people from all aspects of my life who regularly comment, tag and post it’s impossible to leave it alone for more than a few hours.

Currently taking a back seat and temping while i seek inspiration for my next project.

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